(Can You Feel My Heart -- Bring Me the Horizon)

Monday, January 16, 2012

Birthdays and HP.

It was Mickey's birthday on Friday.
She had a party, and it was a mild disaster.
It ended okay, I would say.
But I think I've just been having a kind of bad time lately.
Like, there's someone that's walking around my life, dropping bits of explosives, forcing me to run before they detonate or stay and fight.
That someone is always me, of course.
I fight, but I run. It's confusing. I don't know what I'm doing.
The future is forever in my face. I'm terrified. God, it's so black.

I finally watched the final Harry Potter.
It's done now. And I'm sad, because it was a large part of my childhood.
It's a love I've had forever but haven't divulged in in a long time... and now it's done.

I feel like an emotional wreck.
Everybody uses me.
Only Jean really likes me.
I want to go back, back to any time but now.



  1. That reminds me of the scene in Wasted (Marya Hornbacher) where she's talking about how as a kid, when she finished a book, it made her depressed because it's like the characters were dead.

    Try to find something new! Did you read the books? I heard the Hunger Games were good. Or maybe get into LOTR, though that's over too. Cirque du Freak is really good for a light read.

    I hope you feel better. <3

  2. gah. i hate the sound of any 'disaster'. are you alright, my dear? :(
    ahhh. the final HP broke my heart. and Percyyyyyy. oh God. i love Percy. yes. i mean the Percy from HP. that's just insane, eh?
    :( i hate the sound of emotional wreck. try to keep your head held high, lovely. <3 we love you. and we hope you feel better soon and if you don't, then butterflies meet butterflies, and i will help you find your wings.
    -Sam Lupin

  3. We really like you! <3
    and things will get much better, really soon! don't worry!
    and sam, you're a strange one aren't you. Percy. gah.
    Feel better soon Jessie! xox <3