(Can You Feel My Heart -- Bring Me the Horizon)

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Dinner and movies.

I was supposed to go see Red Riding Hood today. :/
I think I'm going tomorrow.
I'm pissed, and fucking sad or whatever.

I was at a friend's -more like a friend of a friend's really- house today, from, like, two to five-ish.
We're making a music video for Band...
It's sort of really fucking lame, but it'll be okay I guess.
We're supposed to be wolves I guess, fighting over territory?
Even though the song has nothing to do with that...
But whatever, hopefully it'll turn out pretty epic.
....We had to do a lot of walking in the snow.
I don't have a jacket, or boots; so I was in a sweatshirt and Converse.
Yeah, horrible idea.
It's pretty hard to run in snow, too.
Especially drifts and soft stuff.
Ugh, it sucked.

Aniwayz; my friend's mom brought me home, and nobody was here.
I called my mom -no answer.
I called my dad -no answer.
I called my brother -surprise, surprise;
It's fucking loud on the other end and I'm just like "What the Hell? Where are you guys?"
"Oh, we're out having dinner."


I've been complaining about not having food for three days;
I've been living off grilled cheese.
Only a few months ago my mom was WORRIED about me having a fucking EATING DISORDER;
And now they don't even give a shit if I'm not eating.
They think I'm fat.
I know they do.
They practically tell me all the time, I can hear it behind their words.

I want food.
I don't even care.
I'm stuck in a rut.
I hate this.
I'm fucking hungry.

Oh my God.

I was talking to an online friend about this, and she was being so fucking funny about it.
I wish I could punch her in the face.
Someone rang the doorbell, and it was my brother, and I told her that I hate my family.
She said they probably hate me too.

I hate this.
Maybe I'll have chips.
Or just go out and bitch about the lack of food in our house.
Fucking bastards.

People reading this probably think I'm some sort of fat shit that deserves to starve for a week or two.
Yeah, you're right.

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